Sasquatch Ale Homebrew Competition

This week was the deadline for the Sasquatch Ale Homebrew Competition.  In short, the competition is for a beer to be the embodiment of a "Sasquatch Ale" capture a special, Northwest, "Sasquatchian" flavor.  The winner gets their recipe scaled up and brewed as the official "Sasquatch Ale" for the NHC in June.  Judging is tomorrow and I entered four beers and for each you had to come up with a reason why your beer has that "Sasquatchian" flavor.  Here are my four silly stories:

Meatstick:  The Sasquatch has long been the brunt of unfair jokes and discrimination in advertising.  Remember that whole “Messin' with Sasquatch” campaign?  Someone needs to call the ACLU about that one. But the biggest indignation might have been the long running association with that Canadian swill known as Kokanee.  Everyone knows that after a long day of chasing elk and terrorizing baby marmots, a Sasquatch likes to sit back and relax on a bed of soft hemlock bows and knock back a few smoked porters.  He just loves that smooth, rich, chocolate, rum and ashy mix because it reminds him of all those campfires he has to stamp out when groups of careless, city dwelling hipsters get too drunk and pass out while the fire is going full throttle.  Yup, a smoked porter – perfect for those long dark nights in the mossy, damp woods he calls home.

Toasted Meatstick: When the rain soaked slopes of the western Cascades is a little much for Sasquatch, he likes to head to those drier eastern slopes of the Wenatchee National Forest.  Here the Sasquatch enjoys the sunlight, ponderosa pines and the stunning views of Mt. Stuart.  This version of my smoked porter has been aged on oak spirals to bring out a mellowing dryness and earthy character that smoothes out the smoke, chocolate and rum flavors of the base smoked porter.  The Sasquatch is well known to enjoy this beer alongside some smoked lake trout, which he occasionally grabs out of Lake Chelan.

 

Sas-Squashed: For centuries, people have rambled the vast forests of the Pacific Northwest in search of the great Sasquatch, but somehow he always eludes capture or direct evidence of his existence.  I know; that’s totally crazy in this day of smart phones, ipads and temperature controlled conical fermenters.  But I will let you in on a little secret – to see a Sasquatch, all you have to do is leave out his favorite food – smoked squash.  It works just like Yogi Bear and fresh baked pies.  He mostly enjoys Hubbard squash slowly smoked over pecan wood chips and more recently, I’ve found that he enjoys beer when brewed with this smoked squash.  And that’s what you have the pleasure of drinking right now – a brown ale base beer that was brewed with smoked Hubbard squash in both the mash and boil.  All the smoked flavor and aroma was derived from the squash alone and results in a smooth, malty beer with pleasant smoke flavor and a light meatiness from the squash.

Sas-Squashed – Winter Vacation edition:  While is it a well known fact that the Sasquatch loves to eat smoked squash when he’s trouncing around the Pacific Northwest, it’s much less widely known where he spends his winters.  The common misconception is that he hibernates all winter in a den somewhere much like bears do.  However, like many humanoids of this region, the Sasquatch also enjoys relaxing and soaking in the rays in the Caribbean Islands during the winter time.  Specifically the western shores of Jamaica, where he spends his time surfing, smoking spliffs, dancing to dub reggae and forgetting about the rainy Pacific Northwest for awhile.  Seriously, this was all documented and reported by the CIA, Seattle Beer News or maybe it was TMZ.  In honor of this annual pilgrimage, my smoked squash brown ale has been aged with oak spirals soaked in Jamaican rum.  This additional treatment combines the tasty smoke flavors with a layer of spices, coconut vanilla and dry oak that would make for an enjoyable evening of jamming with a few Sasquatches in Jamaica, or anywhere else for that matter.